Caledonia    Counseling

After 16 years of working with adults - the parents of our student athletes - I've decided to reach our youth.  If I can educate and help them to see the negative aspects of dating, marriage, and families that are "naturally" developed through normal socialization and routinely passed on from one generation to ther next, then we can reduce domestic violence and family violence in the foreseeable future. I hope to help them re-write their internalized programs. 

Documents at bottom of page. 

Domestic Violence has been associated with 54% of the mass shootings over the past two decades plus (Everytown).  As a Columbine High School gradute, this issue strikes home.  And a neighbor's son faced the Sandy Hook shooter - thank God the gun jammed! Domestic Violence is highly associated with depression and suicide, substance abuse, bullying, sexual assaults, and street gang violence too.  Dr. Peter Langman found that one-third of all school shooters experienced significant family abuses and personal traumas.  And while just over 50% of them reported being bullied, they didn't target their bullies.  Instead, they randomly targeted the general population - most likely as lashing out for having felt rejected by their peers.  This is why INCLUSION is so critical to changing the lives of those feeling marginalized.  

Almost every man that I have worked with said to themself at one point in their childhood, " I am not going to be like that asshole!!"  And meant it.  But the programming began before they were very conscious of the processes and pains.  In time, as life became stressful and the hurts, pains, and insecurities of childhood surfaced, the programming kicks in.  And while most were "better" than his father, they carried guilt for loosing their cool and blowing up at times over stupid shit.  My clients come to see their patterns today casting the same shadow as their father's behaviors in the past.  Issues with their mothers have also been prevalent for various reasons.  STAHRS hopes to reach the teen men and women to educate them. 

CHANGING LOCKER ROOM

BEHAVIORS & ATTITUDES

STAHRS hopes to highlight the pitfalls and red flags of dating and baggage. 

Research, and the descriptions of the marriages and relationships of my private clients, have basically been the same as the court-ordered clients.  Ultimately, couples exhibiting intimate partner abuse experience it as mutally combative where each person engages equally with verbal and milder physical abuses.  The more severe physical abuses are typically perpetrated by males. 

Let's educate and help high school and collegiate athletes to create and maintain healthy relationships without violence.  Let's reduce domestic violence and sexual assualts in high school and college before they develop into family dynamics to be passed on from generation to generation. Let's reduce bullying and build compassion and empathy once again.  STAHRS aims to reduce violence today and for our future generations- at home, in school, on a date, at a party, etc.  Please help this intiative reach our children- someday they will become parents.  

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Violence Against Women

Common Dynamics Explained

Anti-Bullying Curriculum

Myths

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